Oh yeah so it happens that on a very nice Sunday afternoon my 12 year old daughter is in her room and decides that her pretty, sparkly, dangly thing hanging on her window is shining just right for an awesome picture. It also just happens that she opens her curtains to take the picture and all hell breaks loose next door at the neighbours house.
So my son calls to me and tells me the neighbour is calling dad's name and telling him to get out there right now from the side of our house and his. What??? I step out on the deck and "wham" the neighbour starts yelling at me about someone invading his privacy, taking pictures of him from inside our house. He's going to call the cops yada yada yada I should have told him to go ahead.
So once I get all this figured out and yell at him that he's basically calling out a 12 year old girl ahem here's where my brain fart happens. "Settle down for petes sake she's a 12 year old they take pictures, she's 12, 12, 12" yeah I know something should have went ding ding ding in my head but it didn't. I think it did for his son in law as he pulled him away and said I think this is over.
So I went inside and started thinking about all the things he said and the lightbulb goes off ....oh my god he's staring into my 12 years old bedroom what the hell, the friggin old perv had a lot of nerve let me tell you. Oh My God, Oh My God fbomb b***** yeah the foul language was rolling. So what did I do? Well I can't just go around accusing someone of being a perv without evidence. What I can do is I can put a solar plating on her windows, yup I did now all he can see during the day if she opens her curtains is his own lovely (ugh) visage staring back at him from her mirrored window. However she can still see outside albeit it's a little less sunny but it keeps her safe from his prying eyes.
Karma will come around it always does one day it will come and bite him in the ass and I hope it hurts.....
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
The Whole LGBT Legislation Issue
Is it just me or has the whole world gone crazy. Listen, I don't care what your sexuality is, I don't care what you practice at home. What I do care about is my children and their rights. Just as much as you care about yours.
So here's the whole ball of wax in a nutshell the NDP government in Alberta has set up legislation that allows the LGBT community a wide assortment of rights in schools here in Alberta. It's a great and it's long winded and seriously if you really want to know about it go look it up because if you haven't heard about it yet, well you have your head in the sand.
So, there's a whole bunch of blah, blah, blah let them be who they are whatever which is great and should have already been happening.
Then there's this, a LGBT person can use either a private bathroom (awesome they should have that choice) or the bathroom of the gender they feel they most relate to ... ahem. Ok, well that's not horrible after all half the time in the girls bathroom you don't know who's in the stall next to you anyway it could truly be anybody.
An LGBT person can also use the change room of the gender they most relate too..... woops! What? See that means that a transgender, a lesbian, a gay, or a bisexual can use the girls/boys change room. Since most schools under grade 5 don't use change rooms for gym that doesn't matter and at that age really most of those kids could care less.
And really none of this should matter if it is regulated properly. The problem isn't in the need to allow people the right to choose it's the way it's worded. Again, none of this should matter if it's handled and regulated properly. For instance offer stalls in the change rooms then it won't matter who is using them because there is a certain amount of privacy in stalls. Not just any stalls by the way but floor to ceiling and no cracks stalls. It's going to take longer to get changed for gym but this is the price the schools, the student's, the teachers and parents will pay for this legislation. I guess to combat this children will have to start school at 8:00 a.m. and go to 4:00 p.m. What's the matter with that? I think its a fair price to pay if a girl with a penis or a boy who is bisexual, or a boy who identifies with his female side wants to share my 12 year old girl who identifies as a girl's bathroom and change room.
I also want to point out that a boy who is transgender, bisexual or gay and identifies as female can also join the girls sports teams. This is OK right no problems there you think. I agree this should be OK but I can see someone taking advantage of this part of the legislation and putting ringers on their team. Now, hopefully all things being equal most coaches or teams are ethical. It should work that way but you know that someone, somewhere is going to try. How do you call someone out on that? How can you prove it? It's just me thinking ahead it doesn't mean it will happen but it could, couldn't it? So how are they going to regulate this and ensure each school treats this legislation ethically.
When I first read some of this legislation I have to admit I was very worried and very concerned but rather than offer a knee jerk reaction (well maybe I did but partially) I decided to read what others were writing and listen to what others were saying. I have to admit it was interesting reading and it has shifted some of my views but the bottom line for me is how this legislation will be regulated. I feel greatly for the schools that must implement this legislation as I do not think this will be an easy adjustment.
So here's the whole ball of wax in a nutshell the NDP government in Alberta has set up legislation that allows the LGBT community a wide assortment of rights in schools here in Alberta. It's a great and it's long winded and seriously if you really want to know about it go look it up because if you haven't heard about it yet, well you have your head in the sand.
So, there's a whole bunch of blah, blah, blah let them be who they are whatever which is great and should have already been happening.
Then there's this, a LGBT person can use either a private bathroom (awesome they should have that choice) or the bathroom of the gender they feel they most relate to ... ahem. Ok, well that's not horrible after all half the time in the girls bathroom you don't know who's in the stall next to you anyway it could truly be anybody.
An LGBT person can also use the change room of the gender they most relate too..... woops! What? See that means that a transgender, a lesbian, a gay, or a bisexual can use the girls/boys change room. Since most schools under grade 5 don't use change rooms for gym that doesn't matter and at that age really most of those kids could care less.
And really none of this should matter if it is regulated properly. The problem isn't in the need to allow people the right to choose it's the way it's worded. Again, none of this should matter if it's handled and regulated properly. For instance offer stalls in the change rooms then it won't matter who is using them because there is a certain amount of privacy in stalls. Not just any stalls by the way but floor to ceiling and no cracks stalls. It's going to take longer to get changed for gym but this is the price the schools, the student's, the teachers and parents will pay for this legislation. I guess to combat this children will have to start school at 8:00 a.m. and go to 4:00 p.m. What's the matter with that? I think its a fair price to pay if a girl with a penis or a boy who is bisexual, or a boy who identifies with his female side wants to share my 12 year old girl who identifies as a girl's bathroom and change room.
I also want to point out that a boy who is transgender, bisexual or gay and identifies as female can also join the girls sports teams. This is OK right no problems there you think. I agree this should be OK but I can see someone taking advantage of this part of the legislation and putting ringers on their team. Now, hopefully all things being equal most coaches or teams are ethical. It should work that way but you know that someone, somewhere is going to try. How do you call someone out on that? How can you prove it? It's just me thinking ahead it doesn't mean it will happen but it could, couldn't it? So how are they going to regulate this and ensure each school treats this legislation ethically.
When I first read some of this legislation I have to admit I was very worried and very concerned but rather than offer a knee jerk reaction (well maybe I did but partially) I decided to read what others were writing and listen to what others were saying. I have to admit it was interesting reading and it has shifted some of my views but the bottom line for me is how this legislation will be regulated. I feel greatly for the schools that must implement this legislation as I do not think this will be an easy adjustment.
Monday, January 18, 2016
He's 16, she's 12 my sanity is in question
Oh my goodness, I keep forgetting how long between posts it has been. Well here goes my boy is 16 and my daughters 12 for some of you that's enough you totally understand, you get it. For those of you in the blissful phase of preteen and teen hood I am sorry there's a bumpy road ahead. I'm going to talk about the 16 year old today.
Lets start with school who knew school would be exactly the same socially as it was 30 years ago, who knew that school would demand so much from your teen that they would contemplate suicide (yup I said the "S" word). Who knew that that 16 year old friends were such total and complete assholes that one of them would tell him to "just go ahead and do it already". I can hear some of you gasping I can see some of your faces yeah that's where I was when I found out. I have never hated my son's friends so much then that day, I really had to remind myself that they are all teenage boys. Frankly, they are all stupid at that age and say stupid things that one day they may regret. So lets get to what I did, what I didn't do was ban him from being with his friends (oooh that was hard). I got him some support, he sees a Counselor once a week. She's the person he speaks to, she's the person who isn't his mom who wants to choke that boy, that boy that he went to school with from Kindergarten. It's better for him to speak to someone other than me because I don't have a good opinion of this boy or his other friends nope not at all. Would I talk to the other mother about what her son said? I should, I know I should because I would want someone to tell me if my son did that. How do you do that? Ummm Mrs. so and so I just wanted to let you know that your son who has been friends with mine for 12 years told him to just kill himself the other day. How would you react to that call? I don't know how I would react to that call.
So yeah, I am mad, and hurt for my son and scared so scared. Here's the thing these boys are stupidly clueless about what they are doing (listen I don't think my boy's an Angel). These boys needle my son they try to get under his skin because they can and they have. They have posted sexually suggestive things on his facebook page so he is not longer friends with them on facebook. They call him stupid and tell him he is wrong about everything. That doesn't happen everyday and that's why they stay friends because they have been friends since Kindergarten and even though they are mean and cruel he still sees them as his friends. So these boys, who think they've done nothing wrong, want to go on a road trip at the end of January (its freaking cold and snowy here at the end of January) they've only had their drivers licenses for a handful of months. The place they want to go has a big hill they have to go down on the way in and up on the way out and it is bad for icing. One of the boys going is the one with the mouth it's a 2 hour trip one way and there will be four boys in the vehicle. Hmmmm do I let him go? Can I say "no"? What are the consequences of saying "no"...well... "NO", no you are not going on a four hour trip with big mouth in a vehicle where he can continue to harass and abuse you during that period of time and no one will care. NO, you are not going to a place that has questionably bad roads with a driver who has been driving less that six months and "NO" you are not getting into a vehicle with three other boys who are all loudmouthed and rude and who think its fun to spin donuts on ice.
Am I a mean mom? Yes, I think I am. Do I care about my son? Yes, I do. I love him my heart aches with each painful step he takes into adulthood and rejoices with every successful step he takes. He's my son, he's so important in my world and he's so very important to me. I want to shroud him in cotton wool and protect him from awful things but I know that I can't do that all the time.
So I take baby steps and he's taking running steps and I am gutted each time he tells me he is scared of the future because that's not what I want for him. I want him to embrace the good things in life and throw out the crap but school hasn't changed in 30 years and kids are still cruel and mean. It's a daily adventure for me and the teen but we will survive and I will let go of my cotton and he will let go of cruel friends and we will grow in different ways. I believe in my son there's a good kid in there facing doubts and uncertainties but who is still fascinated by Star Wars and the Moon and all sorts of interesting things.
Lets start with school who knew school would be exactly the same socially as it was 30 years ago, who knew that school would demand so much from your teen that they would contemplate suicide (yup I said the "S" word). Who knew that that 16 year old friends were such total and complete assholes that one of them would tell him to "just go ahead and do it already". I can hear some of you gasping I can see some of your faces yeah that's where I was when I found out. I have never hated my son's friends so much then that day, I really had to remind myself that they are all teenage boys. Frankly, they are all stupid at that age and say stupid things that one day they may regret. So lets get to what I did, what I didn't do was ban him from being with his friends (oooh that was hard). I got him some support, he sees a Counselor once a week. She's the person he speaks to, she's the person who isn't his mom who wants to choke that boy, that boy that he went to school with from Kindergarten. It's better for him to speak to someone other than me because I don't have a good opinion of this boy or his other friends nope not at all. Would I talk to the other mother about what her son said? I should, I know I should because I would want someone to tell me if my son did that. How do you do that? Ummm Mrs. so and so I just wanted to let you know that your son who has been friends with mine for 12 years told him to just kill himself the other day. How would you react to that call? I don't know how I would react to that call.
So yeah, I am mad, and hurt for my son and scared so scared. Here's the thing these boys are stupidly clueless about what they are doing (listen I don't think my boy's an Angel). These boys needle my son they try to get under his skin because they can and they have. They have posted sexually suggestive things on his facebook page so he is not longer friends with them on facebook. They call him stupid and tell him he is wrong about everything. That doesn't happen everyday and that's why they stay friends because they have been friends since Kindergarten and even though they are mean and cruel he still sees them as his friends. So these boys, who think they've done nothing wrong, want to go on a road trip at the end of January (its freaking cold and snowy here at the end of January) they've only had their drivers licenses for a handful of months. The place they want to go has a big hill they have to go down on the way in and up on the way out and it is bad for icing. One of the boys going is the one with the mouth it's a 2 hour trip one way and there will be four boys in the vehicle. Hmmmm do I let him go? Can I say "no"? What are the consequences of saying "no"...well... "NO", no you are not going on a four hour trip with big mouth in a vehicle where he can continue to harass and abuse you during that period of time and no one will care. NO, you are not going to a place that has questionably bad roads with a driver who has been driving less that six months and "NO" you are not getting into a vehicle with three other boys who are all loudmouthed and rude and who think its fun to spin donuts on ice.
Am I a mean mom? Yes, I think I am. Do I care about my son? Yes, I do. I love him my heart aches with each painful step he takes into adulthood and rejoices with every successful step he takes. He's my son, he's so important in my world and he's so very important to me. I want to shroud him in cotton wool and protect him from awful things but I know that I can't do that all the time.
So I take baby steps and he's taking running steps and I am gutted each time he tells me he is scared of the future because that's not what I want for him. I want him to embrace the good things in life and throw out the crap but school hasn't changed in 30 years and kids are still cruel and mean. It's a daily adventure for me and the teen but we will survive and I will let go of my cotton and he will let go of cruel friends and we will grow in different ways. I believe in my son there's a good kid in there facing doubts and uncertainties but who is still fascinated by Star Wars and the Moon and all sorts of interesting things.
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